I’ve spent the much of last week trying to avoid clicking on the video of the young boy who managed to climb / fall into a gorilla pit at the Cincinnati Zoo. We all know how it ended~ not so well for the gorilla.
I tried to avoid reading much about it either because it’s an all around awful and sad situation that I can’t do anything about, but unpleasant things don’t go away just by ignoring them. Especially not on the internet.
Angry mobs formed quickly with burning torches looking for someone to blame.
Years ago, after the death of my own firstborn, I learned that sometimes there just isn’t anyone to blame. Sure, it’s natural to want to find someone to direct our anger and pain at, but sometimes awful things just happen and it’s not really anyone’s fault.
Some rage went towards the zoo, but for the most part, the mother is the one people are blaming. And viciously.
Why do people always blame the mother? (Unless of course there’s a step-mother~then, of course, it’s her fault.)
Of all the negative “bad parent” commentary I’ve come across, a tiny fraction, like maybe 2 comments have even referred to both parents. The rest just blame the mom. The dad doesn’t count I guess?
The thing is, I’m pretty sure all of us could be that mom.
I think if anyone who has actually raised children can say that their kid never got into mischief while they blinked, they are most likely delusional or dishonest.
Kids get into stuff and make mischief. Some are faster than others, and some are smarter than others, but kids exploring the world and making bad choices while giving their parents and the world at large collective grey hair and heart attacks, well.. it’s a pretty natural thing. It happens to all of us.
Maybe the mom was normally super attentive, and this day she was a bit distracted? Maybe she’s always distracted ~ but since I don’t actually know her, I have no idea, and I sure as heck don’t want to judge her.
Although most people are acting like she’s a negligent monster, I did see one writer say she’s a hero~ although I’m really not sure why.
One thing I know for sure is that she could be just about any of us. I could picture at least one of my kids might trying something like climbing into a gorilla cage at age 4.
What I cannot picture is myself remaining calm or even staying on the other side of the fence. I imagine I’d probably jump the barrier myself and use some psychic animal whisperer communication skills to let the gorilla know we were cool. I often connect with animals better than humans so soon we’d all be friends and everyone, including the gorilla would live happily ever after.
Of course, just because I imagine it that way, doesn’t mean that’s what I would actually do in real life at all. I also imagine that I would land my jump into the enclosure gracefully, but realistically, even that isn’t all that likely. I might freeze, I might scream maniacally~ who knows?
I do know for sure that while I’d be super relieved and grateful to have my kid back, I’d also be mortified and heartbroken over the death of the gorilla.
I considered that perhaps if I saw the video, I might have a better understanding of why the people in charge made the choices they did, but really I don’t think so. I think I’d just be bummed.
All I can do is give thanks for my own happy, healthy and sometimes still mischievous kids and know that Gorilla Mom could just have easily been me. Or any of us.
I tried to avoid reading much about it either because it’s an all around awful and sad situation that I can’t do anything about, but unpleasant things don’t go away just by ignoring them. Especially not on the internet.
Angry mobs formed quickly with burning torches looking for someone to blame.
Years ago, after the death of my own firstborn, I learned that sometimes there just isn’t anyone to blame. Sure, it’s natural to want to find someone to direct our anger and pain at, but sometimes awful things just happen and it’s not really anyone’s fault.
Some rage went towards the zoo, but for the most part, the mother is the one people are blaming. And viciously.
Why do people always blame the mother? (Unless of course there’s a step-mother~then, of course, it’s her fault.)
Of all the negative “bad parent” commentary I’ve come across, a tiny fraction, like maybe 2 comments have even referred to both parents. The rest just blame the mom. The dad doesn’t count I guess?
The thing is, I’m pretty sure all of us could be that mom.
I think if anyone who has actually raised children can say that their kid never got into mischief while they blinked, they are most likely delusional or dishonest.
Kids get into stuff and make mischief. Some are faster than others, and some are smarter than others, but kids exploring the world and making bad choices while giving their parents and the world at large collective grey hair and heart attacks, well.. it’s a pretty natural thing. It happens to all of us.
Maybe the mom was normally super attentive, and this day she was a bit distracted? Maybe she’s always distracted ~ but since I don’t actually know her, I have no idea, and I sure as heck don’t want to judge her.
Although most people are acting like she’s a negligent monster, I did see one writer say she’s a hero~ although I’m really not sure why.
One thing I know for sure is that she could be just about any of us. I could picture at least one of my kids might trying something like climbing into a gorilla cage at age 4.
What I cannot picture is myself remaining calm or even staying on the other side of the fence. I imagine I’d probably jump the barrier myself and use some psychic animal whisperer communication skills to let the gorilla know we were cool. I often connect with animals better than humans so soon we’d all be friends and everyone, including the gorilla would live happily ever after.
Of course, just because I imagine it that way, doesn’t mean that’s what I would actually do in real life at all. I also imagine that I would land my jump into the enclosure gracefully, but realistically, even that isn’t all that likely. I might freeze, I might scream maniacally~ who knows?
I do know for sure that while I’d be super relieved and grateful to have my kid back, I’d also be mortified and heartbroken over the death of the gorilla.
I considered that perhaps if I saw the video, I might have a better understanding of why the people in charge made the choices they did, but really I don’t think so. I think I’d just be bummed.
All I can do is give thanks for my own happy, healthy and sometimes still mischievous kids and know that Gorilla Mom could just have easily been me. Or any of us.
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