Pamela Llano Zesty Mom
“When you come to the edge of all of the light you've known,
and are about to step off into the darkness of the unknown;
faith is knowing one of two things will happen.
You'll have something solid to stand on,
or you'll be taught how to fly.”
I've read this poem by Patrick Overton aloud more times than I can remember. I use it as part of a closing blessingway for the pregnant mothers to be in my childbirth classes, and have for years because it seems so perfectly suited to the unknowns of labor and birth.
But, it's just as well adapted to the many other uncertainties life throws at us. And for most of us, life can toss some crazy and unexpected scenarios. I’ve seen it in my own life and in the lives of those around me lately. Change is everywhere, blowing in the wind~ things that seemed stable and normal before are all of a sudden not: relationships, jobs, economic stability.
Everyone knows change is natural, but it's also really uncomfortable, especially when you really have no freaking idea what's next.
Generally, I like to plan, analyze and ponder (and sometimes end up way over thinking things.)
But I’m finding that sometimes, in uncharted waters, all that planning just stresses me out even more, because even after careful consideration, I still have no freaking idea how things will turn out.
At some point, I suppose I’ve grown tired of trying to figure things out, and am trying to just be open to what’s next.
Trusting the universe is an easier concept in theory than reality, and I know that I have a long way to go in the endeavor. But, for me, just letting go of even part of that illusion of control and being open, even just for a small while... that was a big step for me.
And it was the right step, because I found that when I was just open to whatever good things were out there, even if I had no idea what they were going to look like, well... good things came my way, and lots of them.
But being open was just the first step. Once some potentially good thing comes into your universe, you have to decide whether to take more steps towards it. There is effort involved in most cases~ a door doesn’t just open and engulf you. No... you actually have to choose to go through it, and in most cases, you won’t know exactly what’s on the other side or how it will work out.
Which is where faith comes in, and learning to leap through the door and into the unknown, trusting that there will be a solid place to land, or that you’re gonna learn how to use your wings.
Just this morning, as I was thinking and re-thinking a "next step" in my life, this popped into my email from Bassam Tarazi:
"You’re supposed to be unsure. You’re supposed to wonder. You’re supposed to be scared. But I promise you that the trying you do in the face of doubt will be more interesting and more fulfilling than doing something you’re certain of.
Sometimes we just have to let go and summon chaos."
And so, I'm learning to leap, and I'm actually enjoying it quite a bit. I'm flying by the seat of my pants a good deal of the time, but at least I'm in the air.
How about you? Any leaps of faith you're taking, or wishing you had?
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Who is Zesty Mom?
I'm an Artist, Writer, Funschooling Facilitator, Empowered Living Advocate, Wanna-be Organic Gardening Foodie, Travel Loving Life Explorer, Former Goat Herding Chicken Lady, and Full Time Mamacita Extraordinaire to a Couple of Cage Free Kids.
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